Man: Ok, We’ll get you straightened away. Just take this line I throw you and secure it to your aft cleat.
Man: No! At the STERN of the boat!
Man: NO! NO! That CLEAT there. There, on the back of the boat!
Man: THE FUCKING SILVER THING!!

Where: New Brunswick Canada, Cocagne Marine
Who: Bruce

Current rating: : 5.71 out of 6 (Click on the stars to vote)

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Man 1: Why can’t chandleries ever have a half price sale? I mean, if MFI can manage a continuous one through the year, why can’t chandleries have just one? You know?
Man 2: Why bother, they don’t need to, what are you going to do? Screw your stainless bolts off an MFI sofa?
Man 1: It would probably be cheaper in the long run

Where: Port Solent, UK
Who: Assistant

Current rating: : 5.5 out of 6 (Click on the stars to vote)

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Sales guy: And with over 70% of days when we have good weather, you should be able to get good use out of the boat
Buyer (Good naturedly): You are so making that statistic up, I actually happen to work for the Met Office.
Sales guy: No I am not, look, it’s in the brochure!

Where: ****** Boat Brokers, South Coast, UK
Who: Magic Sails

Current rating: : 4 out of 6 (Click on the stars to vote)

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Lady Captain: Ahem, I don’t think so
Outboard Repairs Youth: Well, you asked for it
Lady Captain: No I God Damn well didn’t. I want the sheer pin changed, so why you getting the drill out?
Outboard Repairs Youth: You “Sail Volk”?
Lady Captain: WTF? Thank god I am here, this is “Jocassa”. “Volk”’s over there. Damn!

Where: Sausalito, California, USA
Who: The Volk

Current rating: : 5.6 out of 6 (Click on the stars to vote)

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